Maternal mortality rates, nationwide and at the state level, have received increased attention recently—and with good reason. All pregnant women deserve safe, healthy deliveries. Access to high-quality, compassionate, prenatal and postpartum care is crucial.
Equally important, and perhaps less known, is another alarming statistic: pregnant and postpartum women are more likely to be victims of violence than their nonpregnant peers. In fact, one of the leading causes of death among pregnant women in the U.S. is not medical complications, but homicide.
How can this be? During this Domestic Violence Awareness month, all of us at Birthright are taking a moment to remember those at risk and to consider how best to support them.
A pregnancy will impact different people in different ways, but it may also threaten the status quo. Whether a woman chooses to abort, adopt, or carry, her reality, and her partner’s, has changed. Expected futures may now seem in jeopardy. Already fragile romantic relationships might experience even more strain, and increased financial responsibilities can compound daily stress. These changes and many others feared or expected can add to the overall tension for the couple. For some pregnant women, the risks to their safety are real.
If you are pregnant and these stressors in your relationship feel familiar, you are not alone. In the shock and disbelief of an unexpected pregnancy, it can be easy to miss signs of danger in your relationship. A partner who might put you at risk would do things like:
- Threaten to end the relationship, kick you out, or take custody of your other children based on your decision about the pregnancy
- Deny or question paternity without cause
- Insult or criticize your ability to parent
- Minimize the importance of prenatal care or prevent you from accessing it
- Control your communication with family, friends, or other supportive people who might help you
- Attempt to decide the future of your pregnancy for you
If your child’s father has exhibited warning signs like these, your safety is worth talking with someone about. Our counselors at Birthright have helped many women consider and plan for their safety. Attempting to leave a violent relationship can be an especially dangerous time, and finding allies to help you in the process is essential.
One place to help you start might be the National Domestic Violence Hotline, which is available 24/7 to call, text, or chat. They can help process your situation, plan for your safety, and connect you with support in your local area—whether a trusted counselor, emergency childcare, or even alternative housing options.
You probably know how to keep yourself safe. You might have been doing it for a long time. But statistics suggest pregnancy itself increases the threat to your wellbeing. Take advantage of the support that’s available to you. Talk with a counselor. Confide in a loved one. Visit us at Birthright. Help is just a phone call away. You, and your future, deserve it.
